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As all of my friends here know I am a yoga instructor and a warrior of all things wellness…I am physically fit, strong and focus on all aspects of my health including the emotional, mental and spiritual. I have even dedicated my life to sharing yoga, the tool that has healed me through grief and darkness, so that I can inspire and help others to do the same.
But what you don’t see, what I haven’t shared with you is the whole truth. You see, for the last year and half I have been suffering from some very serious unexplainable illnesses. I have been battling to maintain a basic level of function and energy to do what I do. Some days I wake up and feel like my old self…energized, inspired and ready to take on the world. But those days are so far and few between and I am so grateful for them when they occur. Most days are a struggle and I have to use all of my mental strength to get through them.
This past summer things had gotten so dramatically bad that I thought I was going to die if I didn’t figure this out. My body wasn’t able to fight anymore. I got on a plane and went to see my homeopathic doctor in California. I was diagnosed with chronic cervical vertebrae issues, Lyme’s disease, parasite infection, gall bladder inflammation, heavy metal poisoning, adrenal fatigue, and hormone imbalances, cancer on my DNA, and multiple food allergies. This was just the major stuff. I was put on an intense regimen of homeopathic herbs, nutraceuticals and a specific list of foods. Many of the issues got rectified and some of them I am still healing. I swallow 65 doses a day and eat a very restricted diet. This is how I am able to get out of bed every day. Symptoms I deal with include fatigue, chronic pain, swollen lymph nodes, digestive issues, headaches, dizziness, body temperature regulation, lack of energy and inspiration, depression, mood swings, heart palpitations, and the list goes on.
I am not a hypochondriac by any means and have a very high threshold for pain and discomfort. I am not a complainer and on the outside I look perfectly healthy I’m sure. So, this may come as a surprise to most everyone that knows me.
A few months ago, my sister who has also been suffering a multitude of unexplained illness had a serendipitous conversation with someone and the lightbulb went off.
What has been making us both sick, and susceptible to things most people’s bodies will fight…was something toxic we both had inside of us for 15 years…BREAST IMPLANTS. How on earth did we not connect the dots sooner? I don’t know. But that lightbulb caused us to do extensive research, and through that research we checked off boxes that all made so much sense and gave us answers that we have been seeking.
Common sense and my instincts tell me that I have foreign objects in my body that my body clearly doesn’t like and it is time to Get. Them. Out.
How had we not figured this out sooner? Because we were always told by all of our doctors that our FDA approved implants were safe if they were not leaking. Especially because ours are saline. What we know now is this is far from the truth.
We were led to a website, and a Facebook Page with almost 14,000 members and growing each day–women struggling with Breast Implant Illness and its symptoms. It took me time to wrap my head around the fact that a decision I made to “enhance” my body, a decision so many women make each year, could be the thing that has been taking my life away, piece by piece. Instinctually, I know that this is the missing link. Intellectually, common sense tells me having foreign objects in my body made of dozens of toxic chemicals cannot be a good thing.
I started to look backwards at the timeline of my personal health journey. I had breast augmentation surgery in June of 2002 and was diagnosed with thyroid cancer and Hashimotos disease (an immune system disorder) 5 months later. I literally wrote that off to the “bad karma” of deciding to change the beautiful body that God gave me. I knew deep inside of me then that the decision I made was not true to who I was, but I did it anyway, and blocked that decision out until recently, when I could no longer hide from the consequences. I am chronically unwell even with living the healthiest lifestyle of anyone I know.
I am not one to share things this personal in nature with the public. I am compelled to share with the hope of helping someone, of raising awareness or giving someone answers to questions I have been grappling with for a long time.
On Valentines Day, I am joining my sister on the “other side” and giving myself the greatest gift of SELF LOVE that I can. I AM RECLAIMING ME. I will be getting these toxic bags explanted from my body including every bit of the capsule that surrounds them. I am GETTING. THEM. OUT. I will be traveling to a very skilled and experienced surgeon who believes in and specializes in exactly this. I will embrace my natural “ballerina boobies” and continue my healing journey. I am afraid of course of a multitude of things, but I love myself enough to let go of those fears and give my body the opportunity it has been begging for. I know my body will appreciate it. <3
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